{"id":24463,"date":"2025-11-24T07:00:43","date_gmt":"2025-11-24T07:00:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/updates-www.mccdn.io\/vitals\/?p=24463"},"modified":"2025-11-24T15:59:40","modified_gmt":"2025-11-24T15:59:40","slug":"ywca-healthy-relationships","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/updates-www.mccdn.io\/vitals\/ywca-healthy-relationships\/","title":{"rendered":"Learning to love \u2014 YWCA empowers teens to prevent dating violence","gt_translate_keys":[{"key":"rendered","format":"text"}]},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Relationships can be complicated. Whether you\u2019ve known your partner for five months or five years, not every day will be perfect. And that\u2019s fine \u2014 healthy, even.<\/p>\n<p>Relationships can be complicated. Whether you\u2019ve known your partner for five months or five years, not every day will be perfect. And that\u2019s fine \u2014 healthy, even.<\/p>\n<p>The teams at <a href=\"https:\/\/ywcaspokane.org\/\">YWCA Spokane<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ywcapiercecounty.org\/\">YWCA Pierce County<\/a> remind us that the signs of a healthy relationship aren\u2019t whether we face challenges, but how we respond to them.<\/p>\n<p>For many, our reactions to intense emotions are ingrained in us as children.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Dating violence can begin as early as sixth grade,&#8221; says Chloe Bolz, support advocate for YWCA Spokane. &#8220;We see abuse occurring in intergenerational cycles when unhealthy behaviors are normalized in childhood.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>YWCA Spokane and Pierce County are nonprofits that provide a range of services to survivors and families of intimate partner violence, including emergency shelter, counseling and advocacy, teen dating violence prevention, housing, child care, and job readiness support.<\/p>\n<p>YWCA Pierce County\u2019s teen dating violence prevention programs focus on giving students the ability to recognize healthy versus unhealthy behaviors and empowering them to break the violence cycle.<\/p>\n<p>According to YWCA data, one in four teens will experience intimate partner violence between the ages of 16 and 24. Anyone can display behaviors on both ends of the spectrum, regardless of gender.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat is how we start the conversation,\u201d says Shamiya Anderson (she\/her), youth advocate at YWCA Pierce County. \u201cA lot of times they think \u2018Oh, that could never happen,\u2019 but that is one in four people who they know.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Those statistics helps teens understand they\u2019re not alone in what they experience, explains Rey Ward (they\/them), youth advocate at YWCA Pierce County.<\/p>\n<p>Oftentimes, teens don\u2019t realize their own relationship history may put them in the category of a survivor, they add.<\/p>\n<h2><strong>Healthy vs. unhealthy relationships<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>The Teen Power and Control Wheel and Healthy Relationship Behavior Wheel (pictured) provide examples of what YWCA categorizes as common teen relationship behaviors.<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/updates-www.mccdn.io\/vitals\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/15\/2023\/02\/Power-and-Control-Wheel.png\" alt=\"A pie chart with eight identical segments. Circle in center reads \u201cTeen Power &amp; Control Wheel.\u201d Segments include Extreme Emotions, Emotional Abuse, Isolate, Violates Privacy, Limits Independence, Threats and Intimidation, Minimize\/Deny\/Blame, and Uses Social Status.\" \/><\/p>\n<p>As part of their education materials, YWCA staff present scenarios from the wheel that teens may encounter in relationships \u2014 whether romantic, friendship or familial \u2014 and ask for their view.<\/p>\n<p>For example, they may pull the \u201cemotional abuse\u201d category from the Power and Control Wheel and talk through how it corresponds to the category of open communication (being able to express your feelings and opinions) from the corresponding healthy behavior wheel.<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/updates-www.mccdn.io\/vitals\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/15\/2023\/02\/Healthy-Relationship-Behaviors-Wheel.png\" alt=\"A pie chart with eight identical segments. Circle in center reads \u201cHealthy Relationship Behaviors.\u201d Segments include Trust and Support, Honesty and Responsibility, Open Communication, Intimacy, Self-Confidence and Personal Growth, Fairness and Negotiation, Shared Responsibility, and Respect.\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Some behaviors can be trickier, though, such as jealousy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cJealousy is a normal part of a dating relationship,\u201d explains Ward.<\/p>\n<p>While some teens may not agree with that, Ward says, how someone reacts to the jealousy defines the relationship. If a person responds by limiting who their partner can talk to, that would be an unhealthy response. But allowing it to be a conversation starter allows both partners to get more out of the relationship.<\/p>\n<h2><strong>Creating a space for conversation<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>YWCA\u2019s services center around the belief that participating in an unhealthy behavior doesn\u2019t make a teen a bad person, explains Sojourner Duxbury (she\/her), education and prevention manager at YWCA Pierce County.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s a behavior, not a person,\u201d Ward adds. \u201cWe often leave them with the phrase \u2018Once you know better, you can do better.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n<p>To know better, though, conversation must be had.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Many participants come to YWCA without any real-life examples of healthy relationships,&#8221; Bolz says. &#8220;We do not tell these individuals they are wrong but instead explore how healthy and unhealthy behaviors make us feel.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Prevention staff also address the root causes of socially acceptable relationship behaviors, Duxbury adds, such as social media, which has played a major role in those beliefs.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s about what we learn from society, our parents, etc.,\u201d she says. \u201cWe\u2019ve seen it in \u2018Mean Girls\u2019 with \u2018On Wednesdays we wear pink.\u2019 We want to recognize those smaller behaviors and how they can get bigger.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Many of these topics are ones that teens never get asked their opinion on, Anderson adds. Giving them the opportunity to take a stance can empower them to ask for help, say no or start the conversation with others.<\/p>\n<p>Even with those skills, the conversation can be daunting, especially with those we\u2019re closest to.<\/p>\n<p>Parents often question why their child won\u2019t confide in them, Ward says. For some teens, their parents may be a safe home but not their safe emotional space.<\/p>\n","protected":false,"gt_translate_keys":[{"key":"rendered","format":"html"}]},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Relationships can be complicated. Whether you\u2019ve known your partner for five months or five years, not every day will be perfect. And that\u2019s fine \u2014 healthy, even. Relationships can be complicated. Whether you\u2019ve known your partner for five months or five years, not every day will be perfect. And that\u2019s fine \u2014 healthy, even. The [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false,"gt_translate_keys":[{"key":"rendered","format":"html"}]},"author":115,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[39,127,67],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-24463","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-behavioral-health","category-healthy-living","category-kids-health"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.6 (Yoast SEO v27.6) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>YWCA empowers teens to prevent dating violence - MultiCare Vitals<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"YWCA\u2019s dating violence prevention programs help teens recognize healthy vs. unhealthy behaviors and empower them to break the violence cycle.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/updates-www.mccdn.io\/vitals\/ywca-healthy-relationships\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"YWCA empowers teens to prevent dating violence - 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